Benjamin Kepple

Glory and Honor at Stake This Weekend

GOD, I LOVE AUTUMN. Let me count the ways:

* Saturday, 3:30 p.m. Michigan v. Notre Dame.
* Saturday, 8 p.m. Ohio State v. USC.
* Sunday, 1 p.m. Colts v. Vikings.
* Sunday, 4:15 p.m. Patriots v. Jets.
* Sunday, 8:30 p.m. Steelers v. Browns.
* Monday, 8:30 p.m. Cowboys v. Eagles.

That, my friends, is 18 hours of quality football. One starts with the classic battle between Michigan and Notre Dame; will the Wolverines improve to 2-1 or will downtrodden Notre Dame improve its fortunes against Michigan? Then, just a few hours later, the glorious match between the evil Buckeyes and the even more evil Trojans: can Ohio State -- FOR ONCE -- do the Big Ten proud and defeat USC? (Let's not hold our breaths).

Then, on Sunday, it gets even better -- at least up here in the Northeast. We start off the day a bit slow, with the Colts-Vikings matchup; and as much as it pains me, I must root for the Vikings, for should they win it will put the Colts and Rocket Arm at 0-2. That would be glorious, particularly as the Tennessee Titans would be up two games over the Dolts. (The Titans play the Cincinnati Bengals, which -- let's face it -- is a win for Tennessee).

At four we shall see that epic rivalry in the Northeast, the Jets and Patriots, resume. If the Jets defeat the Patriots -- and I hope they do -- the Jets will take the lead in the AFC East, or at least find themselves tied with Buffalo, who could defeat Jacksonville. Oh, how I like it.

Then, in the evening, the granddaddy -- Pittsburgh at Cleveland. Oh, how I can't wait for this game. In fact, everyone in my family can't wait for this game. Let's review the breakdown of who's rooting for whom:

PITTSBURGH: Benjamin Kepple, Dad, a majority of the extended family
CLEVELAND: Jesse Kepple, Mom
DEFENSE: The Rev. Uncle Dave

Smack talking on The Rant will be done after the game, however, as I do not intend to give my brother any ammunition to throw back at me in the event -- however unlikely -- that Cleveland wins. The Browns winning would be punishment enough.

But even if Cleveland wins, I might still be able to watch Dallas lose on Monday night, when they play the Eagles. I hate both teams, of course, but I hate Dallas more and it would be so wonderful to watch the Eagles beat them. That goes especially since the game is in Dallas and I would so like to see the Cowboys lose at home.

Anyway, as I said, eighteen hours of quality football. I intend to watch every minute of it -- unless the games become absolute blowouts and even I get bored watching. One of my bosses at work, upon hearing of my plan, politely suggested that somewhere along the line -- perhaps during the early Sunday game -- I take a break. Please. That's why God invented March.

Posted by Benjamin Kepple at September 12, 2008 09:15 PM | TrackBack