December 29, 2005

Wanted: New Football Coach

NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY. Position needs filled ASAP. Job entails hiring new slate of assistant coaches, recruiting and retaining talent, and devising offensive plays which could reasonably fool a competent defense. Capability to beat evil archrivals and win bowl games in national spotlight a must, particularly in games with historic import.

Applicants with track record of three-loss seasons or better preferred. Salary negotiable, but will offer at least one honeymoon season in contract. Please send CV and references to: University of Michigan Athletic Department, Schembechler Hall, 1000 S. State Street, Ann Arbor, MI 48109.

Posted by Benjamin Kepple at December 29, 2005 12:36 AM | TrackBack

The refs really screwed UM out of this one.

Posted by: Jesse at December 29, 2005 01:13 AM

The officiating was some of the worst I've seen in years. That said, there was no excuse for Michigan to blow an eleven-point lead and, once again, fail to close the coffin lid on what should have been a relatively easy match once we achieved that lead.

Posted by: Benjamin Kepple at December 29, 2005 07:27 AM

Ben, I've been willing to cut Carr a lot of slack, but after last night I'm thinking of jumping on the "dump Lloyd" bandwagon. I went to bed when UM was up 28-17 and figured we had the game won -- big mistake, considering we'd blown 5 games this year after leading in the 4th quarter. That said, I'm not sure you can outright fire Carr at this point - the guy *did* win the school's first national title in half a century, after all. There must be some classy way to bump him out...

Posted by: Lee Bockhorn at December 29, 2005 01:53 PM

Lloyd Carr has a lot in his favor. As his umich bio page accurately points out, "Lloyd Carr has led the University of Michigan to a bowl game in every season at the helm, and claimed the Big Ten title five of the past seven seasons (1997, 1998, 2000, 2003, 2004). He became the first Wolverine coach to win four straight bowl games, beating Auburn 31-28 on New Year's Day at the 2001 Florida Citrus Bowl, after leading U-M to victories in the 1998 Rose, 1999 Citrus, 2000 Orange and 2003 Outback Bowls."

That said, there haven't been any championships since 1997. And even that one I don't credit to Carr as much as I credit Charles Woodson. Frankly, after seeing so many 4th quarter losses this year, I have about had it.

Posted by: Matthew S. Schwartz at December 29, 2005 11:03 PM

I think it would be perfectly classy if Coach Carr was bought out of his contract. It'd be a win-win for all concerned!

At the rate we're going, Coach Carr will next lead us to victory in the San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl.

Posted by: Benjamin Kepple at December 30, 2005 12:03 AM

sweet christ on a hammock, what the hell was that? i'm stumped. i'll give you a call from pittburgh as I cheer my beloved Lions on to a sure fire humiliating defeat. that will be all. happy new year.

Posted by: simon from jersey at December 30, 2005 12:43 PM