October 28, 2004

Cinematic Sins Reveal the Worst in Us

WELL, WE NOW have certain proof that we're in serious need of a good two weeks in the country. For the past hour and a half, we have been watching "Bedazzled." Yes, that movie with Elizabeth Hurley playing the Devil.

You know, it's bad enough we honestly can't remember how we started watching this, but perhaps even more disturbing is that we're continuing to watch it. We mean, it's not as if Ms Hurley makes a convincing Devil; it's like she's the third-rate, temporary fill-in for George Burns. Mr Burns, of course, had that role figured out back when he played it. He wasn't about to let any greedy human weasel out of his or her contract. That's because he was evil. That's what he did. And then he enjoyed watching the human squirm in the midst of it all, which was really evil. Besides, if we recall right, he also drove that kick-ass evil KITT-like corvette.

Ms Hurley, on the other hand, is turning in a performance that would get her sent to the House of Correction for Incompetent Tempters, as a certain diabolic missive once termed it.

Despite this, though, we actually find ourself rooting for Ms Hurley, even though it is wicked for us to do so. You see, we're already so annoyed with the main character that we can't wait for her to cast him down into ...

What! No. NO!

OK, dig this: The guy has not only managed to weasel out of his stupid agreement, he's gone and Developed a Spine. Now he's Bested the Workplace Bullies and Found a Different but Great Girl who is Not the Girl He Originally Liked. Even worse, he's realizing The Truth Lies Within and other Pop-Culture Platitudes About Life. We'd like to think that's a very sly joke on the part of the screenwriter -- perhaps the guy isn't out of the woods yet -- but no, all is well and he has a new and improved outlook on things. Hey, and look! The Devil's just a very likable evil spirit after all, isn't ... she. He. It. Blah.

Oh, God!

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(As penance for the above really nasty post, we will re-read The Screwtape Letters for much of this evening).

Posted by Benjamin Kepple at October 28, 2004 10:44 PM | TrackBack