October 06, 2004

The Humiliation of Doom

EARLIER THIS EVENING, we were playing a bit of multiplayer Doom 3, the popular "first-person shooter" game. We can assure you this enjoyable, but often-frustrating pursuit, has proven instructive for us in many ways.

What are some of these lessons, you ask? Allow us to explain:

One. It is galling when one's player gets shot, finds himself fried, or meets the wrong end of a shoulder-fired missile. It is especially galling when one's player does so thanks to the actions of one's own teammates.

One-B. It is gratifying to turn said teammates into ashes with heavy weaponry, even if it does cost the team a point. They have to learn sooner or later.

Two. That said, it is mortifying to see teenagers with such proficiency at kicking our ass on a regular basis, especially with the rocket launcher. We are sorry, but it's not exactly helpful for our own morale if an opposing teenager is able to jump up, dodge our fire, ready and aim his rocket launcher, and successfully turn us into dog food with a thousand-to-one shot.

Three. Fortunately, teenagers generally haven't figured out small-unit tactics. This evening, we were able to deal out much pain and suffering to our opponents simply through teamwork. Three of the players on our side monopolized an area of the game map chock full of weapons, and then blasted any of the opposition that so much dared to challenge us. Yeah. Move. Get out the way.

Clearly, we can see it's simple for a player to win "Doom 3" on a multi-player setting. Work together with your teammates, keep an eye on your back, and always -- always -- let the teenagers rush into situations first.

Posted by Benjamin Kepple at October 6, 2004 12:06 AM | TrackBack

I seem to remember a TV ad for SOCOM, where a bunch of teenagers were playing against another group and were having their heads handed to them. They kept asking themselves and each other "Who are these guys?!" The cutaway scene then shows the 'other' team - a bunch of Navy SEALs kickin' back and relaxing with a little online play. It goes to show how well teamwork produces results.

I've always liked that ad.

Posted by: DCE at October 7, 2004 07:18 AM