June 09, 2003

So Bryan @ AWS Thinks I'm Insane, Eh?

Bryan, over at Arguing with Signposts, has argued that my love for the Pittsburgh Steelers is proof that I am deranged.

I would first like to express my sincere condolences to Bryan. Clearly, in his days as a football fan, he has failed to grasp just how glorious and wonderful the Steelers organization is. This is made obvious in his post condemning America's greatest football team. You should know that Bryan makes a snarky comment comparing the Super Bowl championships the Steelers have won with the victories scored by the San Francisco 49ers and Dallas Cowboys.

That's just wrong.

You see, even though the Cowboys and 49ers have each won five Super Bowls, while Pittsburgh has only won four, there are crystal-clear differences which prove the Steelers are the better group.

To take San Francisco's example, I would note that two of their Super Bowl victories were against the Cincinnati Bengals.

Clearly, those can't count as true victories, since it would violate natural law for the Bengals to actually win the NFL championship. I would sooner expect Einstein's laws of relativity to be overturned than to see the Bengals win the Super Bowl. Hence, it is clear that San Francisco has only won three Super Bowls on the team's own merits. The other two were, for all intents and purposes, free for the taking.

Secondly, I do not understand how one can compare the valiant, God-fearing Steelers squad with the Dallas Cowboys. I present this excerpt from the Houston Chronicle of August 4, 1997, to make my point:

... the Cowboys are trying to restore their image as "America's Team" and rid themselves of the jokes about being "America's Most Wanted."

Five players have been suspended for violating the NFL's substance abuse policy, including two of the team's biggest stars, wide receiver Michael Irvin and defensive tackle Leon Lett. Lett currently is serving a year's suspension, his second, for drug use.

Last year, Irvin was sentenced to four years probation after pleading no contest to cocaine possession. Earlier this year, he and Erik Williams were stung by a woman's false accusations that they had assaulted her.

Williams had just completed two years probation on a drunken driving charge...

These type of things just wouldn't happen in Pittsburgh -- or, if they did, certainly not on a scale that would expose the franchise to mockery, ridicule, and public disdain. That's not how things are done in Iron City. So I utterly reject these baseless and foolish claims that the Cowboys and the 49ers are better teams than the Steelers.

The Steelers are America's team, and always will be. End of story.

Posted by Benjamin Kepple at June 9, 2003 12:25 AM | TrackBack

You are surely an idiot.

For, whether jealous Easterners want to admit it or not, the Dallas Cowboys (and the Niners to be fair) are the two most popular franchises in the NFL, with the Packers in 3rd. This is true regardless of record and titles. All of these teams play in the far superior NFC.

Sure, the Steelers MAY be one of the most popular teams in the AFC, although I think the Dolphins, Raiders, Broncos, and Browns might have something to say about that.

You make one good point here. I won't EVER be caught arguing the greatness that was the STEEL CURTAIN. The 77-82 Steelers were no doubt incredible, and one of the best teams ever assembled.

HOWEVER, I see no valid point, other than one from an obviously deranged and obsessed fan, that could successfully defend calling the Pittsburgh Steelers "AMERICA'S TEAM." That is absolutely laughable.

My laughable franchise, the Detroit Lions, probably sell as much merchandise on the West Coast as the Steelers. I've lived in 3 parts of the country and you see Packers, Cowboys, and 49ers fans EVERYWHERE!!!!

Besides, I hope the Steelers miss the playoffs for eternity after giving Kordell "Hail Mary" Stewart the chance to embarass a once great franchise.

So while I believe the Steel Curtain defense should be mentioned along with the 80s Niners and the 90s Cowboys, don't think FOR A SECOND, that the Steelers somehow are ambassadors to the league. NOT A CHANCE IN HELL!!!!

Posted by: Simon from Jersey at June 9, 2003 03:49 PM

But what have they done for us lately?

I've lived in the DFW area for most of two decades, and was a massive Cowboys fan, even through the Chan Gailey years... But then we were cursed with the Campo years, and my interest in football itself started to wane (also coinciding with the rise of the Stars and Mavericks).

The Jimmy Johnson era (and let's face it, the Switzer Superbowl was a result of Johnson's lingering greatness) is far, far behind us. Nearly forgotten, in fact, in the flood of mediocrity we've had to endure since.

It seems to me the Cowher years haven't been all that kind to Steelers fans, either. The dominance of Bradshaw, Swan, Lambert, Harris, Mean Joe and others has been over for a couple of decades.

Granted, the Steelers are better and have been better than the Cowboys as of late; but it doesn't seem that cool to always fall short. Even the Niners have been plagued in recent years with their share of coaching and personnel problems.

These shouldn't tarnish the memories of the great years, but they are really just memories. Dallas Mavericks fans have shown a great capacity to forgive and forget all the past transgressions and failures of the Mavericks franchise; by the same token, I'm not going to excuse the Cowboys' embarrassing performances and poor choices of the last several years just because in some bygone decade they had some great performances and triumphs.

The Immaculate Reception is great football history. But you see, I was raised in Houston, by an Oilers fan, during Steeler dominance. My very first exposure to sports probably came in the form of my father and his buddies engaging in Steeler-bashing. Heh. :o)

Posted by: Kevin White at June 9, 2003 04:02 PM

You know, Ben, just calling Pittsburgh "America's Team" over and over doesn't make Pittsburgh "America's team" any more than putting "Hockeytown" at Center Ice of Joe Louis Arena made Detroit "hockeytown" (I think Montreal and Toronto might have something to say about that).

Posted by: bryan at June 9, 2003 04:35 PM

OK, if you're going to start bashing the Red Wings, we're going to need to take this outside :-D

Posted by: Benjamin Kepple at June 9, 2003 10:40 PM